A vision for pregnant women
November 8, 2018
The girl child: how a blessing is considered a burden
November 15, 2018
Whether it’s the first, second or third pregnancy, the joy is immeasurable and whether it is losing the first, second, third or fourth unborn child, the grief cannot be less.
This is a story of a very dear friend. We have witnessed many ups and downs of life together and been with each other through thick and thin. But this episode of her life left many unexpressed feelings amongst us as well.
It was her third pregnancy and fourth child (the previous pregnancy resulting in twins). It was progressing well, until one day in her 6th month, she noticed to her dismay, the reduced size of her abdomen. When she rushed to the hospital, she came to know that there was a loss of amniotic fluid as her baby’s kidneys were not functioning. She consulted quite a few radiologists and gynaecologists and every one suggested she terminate the pregnancy. Even if the child was born, he wouldn’t survive, she was told.
Shaken to the core, she couldn’t make out what to do. How could she end this pregnancy herself, which she had been asking for?! Between the different opinions and fatawas, she was totally clueless. It was by far the most difficult decision she had to take.
She wept for hours. Her three children had no idea what was going on.
In her next visit to the hospital, the doctor announced that the baby did not have its heartbeat anymore. Inna lillahi wa inna ilaihi raji’oon.
She was told to come the next day for further procedures.
The most distressing part of a miscarriage is returning home from the hospital, without the baby. To bear all the postnatal ordeals, without a baby in one’s arms at the end of it.
The only person she could seek solace in was her husband; who himself was miserably shattered. Together they came out of this trauma, though it took some time.
Amidst this agony, she was thankful to Allah to save her from ending her pregnancy herself.
It is indeed the most horrible chapter of any woman’s life. None but those who experience this can understand. A positive environment, a supportive family and good friends can help any woman come out of this. And above all, it is the belief and calm acceptance of Allah’s pre-destined fate.
Allah knows the pain. That’s why He promised the grieving parents will reunite with their unborns in Jannah.
